Tuesday, July 26, 2005

my wife the porn star

One day, about a week ago, mrs. Ninjamunkey posted a blog on her site. Apparently a friend she works with found a porn actress he thought she resembled. So he forwards her photos, which she posted on her site. When she showed me, of course my first reaction was “ok that is kinda icky, I don’t watch porn and compare the actresses to my friends, there is something off about that” but then my followup reaction was “hmmm, that is odd, she does kinda resemble mrs. Ninjamunkey.” So of course, being a dutiful husband, I had to go out and download some of the porn in question, as research. Yes, she actually does have some similarities to my wife, around the eyes, the eyebrows, stuff like that. The boobs, much larger, but fake, so not nearly as nice. Yes, you heard it here first, I am not a fan of the fake boobies.

Apparently, said porn star is a big fetish queen. She likes to be tied up, and whatnot. While a little bit of that is cool, something about the ball gag and such gets a little too deep into the “ummm, Im a little uncomfortable” zone. Something about gimps, and pulp fiction, I guess.

So after some research, I have determined that my wife is as hot as the porn star in question, hotter actually. There is something about porn stars that have always turned me off. Its that movie theatre floor mentality. I know its sticky, and I don’t know with what, and I really don’t want to know, so its best not to go barefoot in there. It’s the same thing. I absolutely do not need a porn star, when I have something better waiting on me at home.

So while the similarities are kinda neat, in a different sort of way, please don’t think my wife is a porno queen, and for the love of god, leave that in your pants when you talk to her.

Monday, July 25, 2005

Work and then some...

So on average for the last month, I have had 59 hours a week. That is the average. Its amazing the things that I have not noticed since I have worked my butt off. I drive past buildings everyday on my route in or out of the office, and suddenly there were new ones this morning. When did those show up????

I dont want you to think that my blog is only going to be about bitching about work, the lack of, the over abundance of, or whatever, but right now, its the only thing I feel like I do anymore.

We went and visited my munkey-in-laws this weekend, and let me tell you, a 4 hour car ride to visit with people you never feel you will ever be good enough to please, well it made for a great time by all.

There are so many things I would like to mention, but honestly, I am sneaking this blog time in between jobs right now, but teasers for next time, in no particular order:

Baby Munkey's Foot Fetish
Being married to a porn star look alike
Finding neighbors to be friends with, and giving them a months salary
being invisible and loving it
getting over my sticky aversion if I want to drive my car
wondering who is reading this at all, and if they enjoy the teasers
My dissappearing sister act, or how I stopped loving and learned to fight the war

Tuesday, July 12, 2005


Technical terms that sound dirty, but are actually not:

"google"-Dude, I totally googled your mom last night.
"floppy"-someone toss me a floppy
"thumbdrive"- just stick your thumbdrive in my port over there.
"clusters"-who the hell is playing with my clusters in there?

Yeah, its one of those days

Too Many Cooks...

So yesterday, I figure out that we have a printer that is damaged. I contact our vendor, and set up to have a replacement. After I left, the new IT manager decided to call one of his contacts to come out and repair the printer. So as I wait for a replacement, some tech comes out, charges 90 bucks, and says he will be back tomorrow with parts. But I will have a replacement, and everyone cannot see why this is annoying. Its easy. We are spending money on something that I had replaced for free.

There are 17 IT guys at my plant this month, helping us get set up. At this point, the biggest part of my time has been spent setting up printers, and running around taking inventory. As soon as everyone leaves, I will be in charge of support, but not have any clue how to support, because everyone is gone who set it up.

And how is your day going?

Monday, July 11, 2005


So today begins another marathon work week. It scares me when they say, "ok fun time is over, time to put in some long hours" mainly cause I have been putting in an average of 12 hours a day already. Yikes.

Mrs. Ninjamunkey had her lasik surgery on Friday, and all seems to have gone well, and she got some really nifty goggles. Hooray!

I am really starting to understand what "terrible twos" are all about.

After watching celebrity fit club last night, I have a strong desire to loose some weight and get healthy. If those people look that horrible 40 pounds lighter than me, how bad do I look?

No one can find my sister. She has vanished. Watch for her picture coming to a milk carton near you soon

having a house is wonderful, unless you dont have time for things like yard work, or anything. Then having a house is a pain in the butt

Is it wrong of my to hope for new neighbors that are decent? Sure all of the houses are filled up right now, but one can hope.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

We are all fine here...

Everything is fine, ummm...how are you? *Han Solo*

So I have been working my butt off for the past couple of weeks. Actually only the last 2 weeks, but when you are putting in 12 plus hours per day, it almost seems like they all run together, and get longer. Work is good, exhausting but good. Every day I am glad that I made the switch to a new job back in May, instead of waiting around for things to get worse.

The family is fine, a bunch of happy munkies, short of missing thier dad, but it cannot be helped.

Tomorrow Mrs. Ninjamunkey has lasik, and she is quite nervous about it. I dont think she has anything to worry about, since I went through the same procedure on the 12 of march, 2004. While the first 10 or so hours after surgery were irritating, it got better, and everyday I marvel about how much a pain life was pre lasik *PL*

So in the saga of Andye, whom we blame for most things in life, she is not talking to the chainsaws at all. Mrs. Ninjamunkey confirmed her place of employment, so perhaps during Ali's procedure tomorrow, I will swing by and say hi. Evil I am sure on some level, but I can use the "I just stopped by to say hi" method.

more later, if I can move my arms