Tuesday, December 27, 2005


Ah yes, the Holidays. That time of year that people you really dont talk to the rest of the year arrive at your house, you spend a lot of money on gifts that wind up either getting regifted to their pool boy, or better yet, go back to the store for something they really wanted in the first place. Ho Ho Ho.

Well, we are past them folks. Now comes New Years. Its not really a holiday. It's more of an excuse for adults that are mature and grown up to take one night of the year and drink like they are 19, sneaking liquor from under the sink. Of course that usually leads to puking on the boxwoods around 3am, but sometimes that is ok. It reminds us why we don't drink like that the rest of the year. Much

I actually have the week between Christmas and New Years off from work. Granted, being a contractor, I don't get paid for this time off, but its a chance to recharge. TO get things done around the house. So what am I doing with my first day? Blogging. Heee.

Actually I came here to relay a funny.

We are a cluttered household. Man, we have stuff stacked, and need to go through, but just have not had time. I have a pile of crap on my desk for the past few months, I don't know what is there, but I am sure I need it. It does not help that I am the world's worst packrat. So I started looking at our front room, where the bookshelves are. I guess you could refer to it as the library, but that sounds so snotty. As I am looking to see if I can part with any paperback, and make a little room, I find 7 books with titles like "How to Declutter..."

Ah I know how to declutter!!!!Eleven!!!11

Stop buying the damn books!

Anyway, I am going to go through this laundry basket of crap and see why I have saved it for 6 months. Wish me luck.

And Happy Holidays, really, even if you take that sweater back I bought you, and trade it in for a Xbox game, its the thought that counts.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

All these things that I have done...

Just a quick catch up of sorts, and hopefully I can get more details over the next week, as i am going to be off work after Christmas until after New Years. Until then I have...

drank way too much whiskey

had steaks at 2 high end restaurants, the first I told you about, the second, I would not really suggest. It was a bit too pretentious for my tastes.

Worked a lot, but been reassigned, so my job revolves around cleaning, stacking and otherwise letting my IT skills go to waste for the most part.

Been to a party in a phonebooth, but it was one hell of a party.

figured out that sometimes, there are people that bend the rules just like I do, only this time it worked to my benefit.

planned a big christmas feast, cancelled a christmas feast, planned a christmas feast.

Began getting things in order for a "festivus" party on new years eve, complete with a patio heater for us smokers.

drank more whiskey

learned that I will actually eat lobster and shrimp, if prepared correctly.

wondered if I should do another whiskey run.

Hopefully I can detail more as time goes on, but for now, here it is.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Food Orgasm

Last night, Mrs. Ninjamunkey and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary. We had reservations for The Fort Worth Chop House. Its a higher end steak house in Downtown Fortworth. I had been looking forward to it most of the week, a time to celebrate, to be a couple, to have a date. The day was shaping up good. I found this right after getting to work. Sweet huh?

I ordered 2 dozen roses, and had them sent to her office. I don't think she had any idea, so that was cool. I went to the store and pick up a bottle of champagne to celebrate with after dinner. I rushed home, after having to stay late for a little meeting with my boss. I showered, and got dressed up. At 5:38pm I get a text message:

Ok so a little damper, but not a big deal. I called the restaurant and pushed the reservation back from 7 to 7:45. at 6:30 she was finally on her way. She got here, changed clothes, and we left.

Its been over an year since i have navigated downtown, but I think I did a great job of guiding us around traffic, and we made it to the restaurant around 8:05. They took us right to our table, and the festivities began.

Understand I was a fat kid. Not only was I fat, I was poor. So going somewhere that the average tab is over 100 bucks for 2 people, and having what can only be described as a fantastic steak, well I was in fat kid heaven. The food, AMAZING. The prices, steep. The crown and cokes? 8 bucks. But they were closer to doubles, maybe even triples. We had 3 each.

We consumed a little of everything last night, not finishing one single dish. It was like a sample here, and a sample there. I ate shrimp scampi for the first time in my life, and loved it. (I hate seafood, or so I was lead to believe) I ate lobster tail that was amazing. It melted in my mouth. Oh my god, my fat boy heart was exploding.

But like all things, you grow up. I knew I could not hold that amount of food, and stopped, and then they brought dessert. A bread pudding with fresh berries. A flourless godiva chocolate cake. Dear god!

All in all, it was an amazing time, and I had someone wonderful to share it with. Probably the finest meal I have ever had, and the greatest date of my life.

Thank you Ali, for 5 wonderful years.

As an aside, I had been planning a entry for yesterday, detailing things that have gone on in the past five years, and how much she meant to me, and what life was like now, and then she posted hers. I did not want to appear to be stealing thunder, so I did not post it. But I will summarize, 5 years=me being the luckiest guy on the face of the earth.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

The Santa Incident-Innocence lost

So yesterday, Ali posted about never being told the Santa myth. I feel bad, because I think every child should at least attempt to believe in Santa. There is a whole sense of wonder, and joy, and the belief of magic. That a fat man flies reindeer across the night, climbing down chimneys and delivering toys to all good boys and girls. Sure, as an adult I thought about Santa knowing when I was sleeping, when I was awake, and my goodness meter, and really, its kinda creepy, but hey its still cool. It is Tradition.

Someone posted a comment on how she was lucky she never found out her parents were lying to her like they did.

I kinda snapped. A bit. (ok it was like 5:40 in the morning, and I am not the greatest morning person) Lying? Seriously? I had parents that lied to me. But I did not hold it againts them for the Santa thing. I believe the sense of wonder that comes from believing in something made up, the attempt to hold something traditional year after year, and well, lets be honest, parents need an edge trying to get thier kids to behave.

Think about it. In elementary school, did a kid come back from Christmas break, and announce that he got nothing, because he was bad? Never. Sure some kids went without, and I remember a 3rd grader that got a carton of smokes, but that is another family all together. No one was ever held out on, and blamed Santa for it.

I am not a christmas person. Its very hard for me to get fired up about it year after year, especially when Walmart starts announcing how many days until christmas in July. Christmas has become a reason to sell more merchandise in the stores, and buy crappy things for relatives that you dont see the rest of the year. But I still get a bit of a shiver down my spine with NORAD tracks santa, and the news teams do announcements about where he is on Christmas Eve. I never wanted to go anywhere on Christmas eve, because, what if Santa missed my house cause I was not there? I used to scan the night skys as we drove from my grandmothers house, looking for that red light scooting across the sky.

My parents were sometimes too honest with me. Once, after practicing all day with a neighbor on my electric guitar, I learned Van Halens "you really got me" opening riffs. I was maybe 12. I ran home and plugged in and called mom and dad into the living room to show off what I had learned. After playing it through, my dad looks at me, and says "that's it?" I did not touch a guitar again for 12 years.

So parents, if you tell kids there is a Santa, your not a horrible person. Your keeping a little bit of hope alive in a otherwise drab world. I plan on fully playing the santa thing with the baby munkey. Let him have fun knowing the truth and playing along, just like I did, its a right of passage.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

catching up...

So I have had many moments over the last few days to write about, but trying to find time to post them has not been easy. I was out sick yesterday, but it was not a rest day for me.

I will start at the beginning...

First, my darling 2 year old baby munkey was sitting in his seat in the car this weekend as a large Hummer drove past. His pointed observation? "Hey look, its a school bus!" Ah, youth.

Sunday, we decided to impose a family day. We went to Dallas to the Dallas World Aquarium to see the sites. I must say, at 16 bucks a person, it was a little dissappointing. The manatees were hanging in thier tank, and actually looked dead. The penguins were bored, and the fish displays were only so-so. Even the big draw for me, the monkeys, were tired, having apparently had a rough Saturday night. The best part was a tunnel walk through where the sharks swam over your head. Quite cool, and baby munkey was quite impressed that something could swim over my head, being the giant that I am not.

Yesterday, Tuesday, I called in sick to work. I assume that the weather going from 89 degrees on Saturday to 30 today had something to do with it. I did have to make a journey to Garland, to retreive our former dog. Apparently the person that we found him a home with decided he was too much trouble and dumped him out. When called on it, he actually said he was too busy for him. So I traveled to Garland, and payed the fees and got him out of the pound, and I think last night we found him a wonderful home.

Today, the weather man is calling for snow and ice. In Texas they might as well say armageddon, because people prepare for it. They make runs on the grocery store, and no one wants to go to work. Right now its probably upper 20's with a light mist. If we get actual precipitation, its going to be a messy drive home. But see, I understand how to drive in it, the key is going slow. Everyone else thinks that if you hurry, you can get home before it gets worse. I dont have to worry about the ice, I have to worry about the idiots on the ice. "Disney presents: Idiots on Ice"

that is all I have for now, doing to work of 2 people is tough enough, but when you are run down and sick, its hell.

Have fun, stay young!

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Great Snack!

Since it has really been a while since I have posted anything of merit, wait, I have never posted anything of merit, but that is beside the point, I thought I would sit down and type out some of the things that I have been trying to remember to share to the rest of my blog readers. (official record for the longest run on pointless waste of time sentence) These are in no particular order, but just randomness that has come and gone in the past few…

I hate it when someone emails me something work related, and CC’s my boss, or his boss. I guess they really believe that if all those names are on there, I will move faster. What they don’t realize is that when I get those emails, I tend to move them to a folder titled “junk mail” and then mark them as unread. That way when the boss or his boss comes to find out why I have not handled the email actions required, I make sure they see me find the email in the junk folder, and say “golly, we really need someone around here that can work on exchange and filtering correctly”. That seems to get their mind off the need to install that printer, especially if they run to their own desks to look for junk mail that might have been valid. With that, I usually buy myself another few hours before the printer gets installed, on my schedule. A little IT trick for you out there.

Why do people pray to Jesus about everything? I mean, we have a guy here, who is probably about 35-40, and is very devout. He likes to have prayer before everything he does. “Dear lord, let me get this fork lift in gear and move those cartons without getting injured”: “Dear lord, Please let the coke machine have more mountain dew, and please let me have correct change” I don’t get it. I thought he was joking at first, and chuckled, and he was offended. That is when I do the patented Ninjamunkey blank look at the ceiling. Ask Mrs. Ninjamunkey, she has seen it once or twice.

This happened to a coworker this morning. Time due in, 6:00am. At 7:55am, my boss calls his cell phone. “Hey man, just wondering where you are” His answer? “Oh I am out on the shop floor at (building location)” Boss: “Huh that’s funny, I have been here since 6 waiting on you, and have yet to see you, get here, now!” See folks, he could have told the truth, that his cat ate his carkeys, or that his tires all went flat at the same time, or in cases where I have gotten that call answered it like this “ Hey boss! Where are you?” Always answer a question like that with a question like that. Got it? Good.

Bumperstickers viewed on the highway of life this week:
“Marriage is the #1 cause of Divorce”- I’d be willing to wager this sticker is #2
“Don’t laugh it’s paid for”-I can also wager you had to finance this sticker too, huh?
“In case of rapture, this car will be empty”-That bad Blondie song? I would leave the car too.
“I love my labradoodle”-thank god someone does, those things are more hideous than the 3 assed monkey!

And again witnessed one of my favorite unintentional jokes. A car marked with shoe polish, FOR SALE-RUNS GOOD broken down on the side of the highway.

That is all for now, gotta get back in there and bounce some emails around. Have fun, stay young, and stop itching it unless you want it to spread.

Monday, November 28, 2005


So trying to catch up for my extended absense from the blog is going to be tough. I have done so much, yet have so little to report. I will attempt to catch up soon with everything, but in quick hit style to be revisited soon...

1) My wife's family seems to have dual opinions of me. I am great, wonderful and super, but some feel that I don't have enough of a future, and will not be able to provide for my family. It is quite hard to resist saying, "unlike so many of you, if I had to start over, I am smart enough to figure it out" Its not like the IT industry is going the way of Betamax. Geez...

2) Alcohol makes every holiday gathering so much easier to tolorate. Just ask me, and that big bottle of Crown I put a major dent into.

3) Work is work, but the future employment options of Mr. Ninjamunkie are looking so much better. Just need to stay focused on the task at hand, and know that somewhere over the rainbow, things are brighter. Hopefully.

4) Never eat chinese food that is described as "strips of beef, deep fried, and covered in a spicy sauce" In fact, ignore anything that is deep fried beef. "you know my T-Bone is good, but if I deep fried it in batter...mmmm boy"

That is about all I have time for now, but I promise to come back as soon as possible.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005


As I attempt to wake up on a chilly Wednesday....

First of all, is anyone else frightened by the fact that I am trying to wake up, only to already be at work, about 35 miles from home? This scares me daily. Not that I think I cannot drive half asleep, as I have most of my working life, but because I see things on the return trip home that I did not notice on the way out that morning. For instance, last night, I noticed a set of buildings that seemingly had been tossed up over night. I know construction is fast, but not that fast. So I probably drove past them in the dark yesterday morning, but was too groggy to notice them. Frightening.

The groggyness is not that hard to understand really, I worked 16 hours on monday, and was back a few hours later for another 12 hour shift. My company is really worried about having to pay for over time, so they keep coming up and asking how many hours I have. Hey dumbasses, you made me work 28 hours in 2 days, so you do the math, I doubt i will work that schedule posted of 12 hours for the next 5 days, but who knows, time may stop

I have yet another job interview this morning, around 11. So if anyone is reading this that I work with, yes, I really have a doctors appointment, and I dress up for him as much as possible...makes the diagnosis a little easier to take. Not that I think anyone I work with is reading this, mainly because I don't talk to anyone I work with. Sure I answer tech questions, and there have been those awkward moments at the coffee maker on Monday where someone one will make a passing "good weekend?" but really, I don't have a social life at work. It's really not my choosing. They tend to gather and go to lunch together (the rest of the techs) and I usually get elected to hold down the fort. Does it bother me? Well, I dunno, you hiring?

We have assistance from home office in this week, and home office is in Flint, Michigan. I love hearing them laugh at the people who are coming in saying, "wow its really chilly out there" and the response from the "Michiginians" is always "Ha, this is nothing" Hey folks, a moment? Its 35 degrees. I dont care where you are, that is considered chilly. If you want to scoff at our weather and make fun of us for wearing long sleeves and light jackets, GO HOME. I dont need your crap. Also, I am not impressed with you wearing short sleeves. That does not shock me, what does shock me is that you can get out of bed each morning, and still make it to work, because I figure your brains turn off each night, considering the vast amount of computer skills you seem to loose each day. Have a glass of STFU on me.

Whew, glad that is out of my system. That could have been dangerous, yelling at some director later in the day.

I know I have said I did not want to post work centric posts here, just because there are only so many ways of saying "work sucks" and still be original. Plus, I hate whining and moaning about things I have when there are people still looking for jobs. So This is out of my system now, and I can go on observing life, and coming back here to poke fun at it.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Chicken Ess...

Two posts, no waiting....

I wanted to touch on something i witnessed first hand yesterday that really took me for a loop.

The company I work for is not bad. They like to pay well, thier full time people from other locations seem to be happy. Locally, its like watching a car wreck in slow motion, only to realize you are watching from outside your own body. I have a manager that lacks tact, management skills, and is usually pretty clueless. I am my normal sarcastic self to him, and he has no clue. He will call me and say things like "Hey, where are you?" only to have me reply with "well hey, where are you?" I answer his questions with questions a lot, and truthfully, it would look horrible on any employee evaluation. I probably shouldn't, but when you put up with crap, and attempts to piss you off, well, you push back.

Yesterday during a staff meeting of the IT brain trust, we were going over a list of projects for the next week. Apparently we have a lot to do, and not a lot of time to do it, so we can expect to work a lot of OT. (does that sound like the theme to Smokey and the Bandit to anyone else, or just me?) He looks at my evening counterpart, and says "Bill*, your name is not on the project plan, because we are going to dedicate your evening shifts to cleaning up, and catching the overflow work from the projects". To me, being left off a project plan is a good way to be left off the payroll, but we carried on. Bill* made suggestions for training classes coming up, and was involved with the meeting.

Shortly after the meeting broke up, I went outside to get a tool from my truck, and as I walked out, Bill* was called back into the building by my boss. They went into HR and closed the door.

30 minutes later I got a call from my boss telling me that he had fired Bill* and wanted to tell me before the rumors got around. 40 minutes after telling him that he was going to be working overflow.

To me, the best way to have handled that situation is for him to release Bill* prior to the staff meeting, and then tell the remainder of the staff at the meeting, not paint a silly picture of work to be done. Another thing would to have done the firing prior to the meeting, and then telling us about how hard we are going to have to work, instead of making us think that now, the work will be that much harder because we are short another associate. I guess what I am trying to say, I would have done it differently, and I can almost be sure that 85% of the managers that read this entry, both of you, would have done the same thing.

Man, I need to go mail off some more resumes.

(*notes that Bill is not his real name, in fact it is not even close. It might be considered a psued...psuedo....fake)

The Coolest Kid on the block...

The baby munkey is amazing. He has an intelligence about him that frightens me. He is kinda like Stewie from The Family Guy, without the lasers and Benny Hill references. I have thought this for some time, but yesterday just cemented it for me.

Flu season is coming up, so Mrs. Ninjamunkey set up to have the baby munkey innoculated yesterday. I picked him up from the sitter, and we drove to the doctor's office. He sat in my lap as we waited, pointing out the various characters on posters in the waiting area. We got a lot of "how adorable!" statements from PA's and nurses on staff. Then a young nurse came to get us.

We went back into the treatment area, and the nurse informed me that I would need to hold his hands, as youngsters tend to grab at the needle. I thought it was a bit much, but held on anyway. I whispered to him that it would be over soon, and that he was indeed a big boy. She wiped the area with a alcohol prep wipe, and asked him if he saw the "birdie" on the wall paper. His reply?

"yes, and a Zebra, a tiger, and a elephant, and a monkey, and another bird" Pretty impressive for a 2 year old. She looked a little stunned, and then stuck him with the syringe. His reply to that?

"Ow, Stop it...can I have some candy now?"

No crying, no screaming, nothing like that. It was almost as if he were pinched. There were children leaving the office as we waited that acted as if thier little feet had been crushed by that crazy lady in Misery. Not my boy. He just wanted a sucker.

This kid has recently had a black eye, from running into a table at full speed. He shrugged it off like a prizefighter. I have seen him jump from the couch, do a cannonball into the carpet, and laugh. Then repeat it.

Obviously he has a high tolerance for pain. I think we are raising a 80 year old man that was not reincarnated correctly the first time. Especially when he asks for coffee and a bagel.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Like a pine forest...

“So why haven’t you written more lately?”
That seems to be the question I get, at least have gotten once or twice. It’s not that I don’t want to write, it is more of time restraints, frustration (which actually might be helped by writing) or just a lack of things to write about. I don’t want to be one of those people that blog about nothing. I am not Seinfield, and don’t want to force the funny. I also don’t want to get into the rut I have in the past, with the “man my job sucks, my boss is an idiot, I am getting shafted…”
So my solution? Write about why I have not written in a while. It reminds me of a paper I turned in for 10th grade composition class. I was supposed to write a paper on creative processes. I wrote about the creative process of coming up with a paper on creative processes. I am pretty sure I got a C on that paper.

New music fun games to play when you are bored at work, or in the car stuck in traffic. Everyone one should do this task, and report back.

1) What is your theme song? Is there one song in your playlist, or CD collection, that defines you? That one song that, when it comes on, you can imagine a movie’s opening credits, and this song is playing?

2) If you had to describe your life, or your lack thereof, could you do it with one mix tape? Pick between 5-10 songs, and imagine putting them on a black tape. You would give this tape to someone, and they would immediately know it was “your” tape.

Well that is all I have today. I was going to write about how hard it is to come up with a catchphrase. How your email sig file might have a catch phrase, but its usually stolen from someone else. My favorite? I Got a Rock.

So in closing….I Got a Rock.

Monday, October 24, 2005


Today, I find myself conflicted. Not about the price of gas, or where to work, or anything like that. I am conflicted about baseball.

You see, I watched game 2 of the World Series last night. The Astros had one of the bigger Series meltdowns I have seen in a while. I felt shocked, and hurt, and a little cheated. But it was only game 2, and other teams have come back from a 0-2 deficit to win it all. Mrs. Ninjamunkey is a Chicago native, and is rooting for the Sox. She had much rather root for the Cubs, but well, that is not going to happen any time soon.

I have been rooting for the Astros. They have such a horrible history, its hard not to. They have guys that have been around since the days of my youth, and it would be cool to see those guys win. And then it hit me.

Houston sucks. They like to think they are better and more affluent than Dallas/Fort Worth. They have the Rockets, who have won that wierd basketball thing. They have Nolan Ryan, and his beef. During the "silver boot" series between the Rangers and Astros, its cut throat. All the Ranger fan needs is Houston coming here next year during interleague play and shoving that damn Championship trophy in our faces. They would so totally make it a "We put Texas on the map for baseball, you guys suck"

So I am going to flipflop my alliance. I think I am going to root, root, root for the Sox. If they dont win its a shame. Its american league, versus national league. Its baseball at its finest, with bunts, and steals and strike outs, and its the Astros.

Friday, October 21, 2005


I am tired today. You see, I am tired partly because I have not been sleeping well, more on that in a minute. the other reason I am tired? I stayed out too late.

Needing to be at work every morning at 5:30 is really tough on your social calandar. Typically I get home around 4 in the afternoon. After sending out resumes to various job boards, I get some cleaning or household project done. By 8, I am ready for bed. I try to turn in around 9, sometimes 10.

Last night, the baby munkey was with the parents for the weekend. Mrs. Ninjamunkey and I were faced with a weekend of child free time. What did we do the first night? well, first, we went to dinner. A local place called Windy City Grill, where they specialize in Chicago style food. It lets Mrs. Ninjamunkey get a taste of home, and I get that as well, though it is not home to me, just the best damn hotdogs in the US.

We left the restaurant and headed over the the local tattoo parlor. We have both been toying with the idea of new ink for a while. I have a 8 inch lizard (seedy) on my arm, and she has Calvin and Hobbs dancing on her hip. I have been wanting something to mark my 30th year, and my overall change in life. She too, wanted something to mark the difference in her life.

After talking to the artist for a little while, it was realized that first, they closed at 10. My kind of place. "We are going to be wild and crazy, but only until a decent hour, then we need to go to bed". Secondly, they did not have enough time to draw both design ideas I had brought for us, and ink them as well. So we were going to have the Mrs' tat done first.

While we had about 45 minutes to kill waiting for the artist to finish up with his previous client (again rather seedy) we went across the street to a small mexican restaurant and sat at the bar for a drink. (perhaps the best Crown and coke I have had in a bar, as they were quite generous and poured a double for 4.50) After a nice buzz we returned the the tat store, and they started her ink.

He was done in about 35 minutes, and I must say, it looks awesome. If I get her permission, I will post photos of his work later, and hopefully tomorrow evening, I can get my work done as well.

So I am tired.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Just a quick note...

So today I had lunch with a technical recruiter. She found my resume online and wanted to talk to me about positions with their company. Side note, these companies need to figure out that I am not loyal to a brand, only that I do something I like, somewhere tolerable, and for the money I want. So we go to Bennigans for lunch and sit down. I look across from us, and there sitting enjoying his salad, is my boss. Not my immediate boss, but his boss. Nice. So I make the eye contact thing, and discreetly whisper to the recruiter that my boss is across from us, and she says :"no problem, so hows your week going? Its been so long since I have seen you!" We casually talk about what kind of work I want to do, without using specifics, and 20 minutes into the food, my boss leaves. We then started talking about jobs with specifics and no codes involved. High tension at the Bennigans today my friends.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Pre-Halloween Horror

So I had known Danny since the 3rd grade. He was one of 4 (four!!!) DannyÂ’s in my class, and was designated as such with his last initial to differentiate between the 4. After high school, and a falling out with my parents, we decided to be roommates. The only problem was, we had about 200 bucks, 2 sofas, and a carton of Camel Wide cigarettes between us. We really had no idea what we could find for 200 bucks, but we found an ad in an East Texas newspaper for a trailer. 200 bucks a month, utilities paid, no deposit. We moved in at once.
The first of many signs of things to be, this trailer did not have usable bedrooms. The bedrooms were located at each end of the thing, but there were holes in the floors of one, and the other was missing a window, or three. It was really not a problem though, since we did not really have bedroom furniture. We moved in rather quickly, since it did not take long to load the sofas, smokes, or paper plates.
He was working at a company making large signs, and would often point out a restaurant sign he had helped make. I was working at a car dealership washing cars and putting those little stickers on the back to say where the car was purchased. At night, we would try to figure out how to patch holes, or fix plumbing, or other things that domesticates were supposed to do.
I left the dealership after a few months, and went to work at Rubbermaid as the guy on the night shift that pulled the hot tote lids from the machine, and trimmed the excess plastic from them. It was glamorous, exciting, and quite possibly the worst job I had ever had, but it paid an extra buck or so an hour to work 3rd shift, and I had all day to work on the trailer.
One morning I got home and found that Danny had pushed the sofa’s together in the middle of the living room. He had a broom, and taped to the end of the broom was a butcher knife. It was as if some sort of lord of the flies was playing fort in my living room. He woke with a start, and started telling me a tale that was too incredible to believe. It seems he was sitting in the living room, oh hell it was a crappy trailer, so to make it more attractive, I will call it the parlor. So he was sitting in the parlor watching TV, and a small furry creature came from another room and was growling and snarling at him. He tried to shoo it away, but it seemed to get larger, and was hissing. It was then that he made his makeshift spear, and was going to go after it. I started sniffing the ashtray, making sure that there was nothing “funny” in there. I walked the length of the trailer, and did not find any sign of an animal, much less a beast from hell with walking fury.
That night, as I was trying to sleep before going to work, I was awaked by a sound that can only be described as a howler monkey caught in the jaws of a wildebeest. I cautiously crept into the hallway, and there looking me in the eyes was the largest possum I had ever seen. He was 3 feet tall, had red eyes, teeth 15 inches long, and mean streak a mile wide. Since I did not have the spear with me, I made the only other rational decision, and threw something at it. He ducked, and vanished down the hole in the floor. A green glow was coming up from that hole, telling me that there was an industrial accident, and this creature was feasting on nuclear waste.
I went to my bag, and grabbed the 45. I unloaded not one, not two, but 3 clips into the floor. I then started packing up the sofas, the rest of the smokes, and decided we were moving.

Now some of this tale is sprinkled with hyperbole, and some of the descriptions are factual. The living room was not a parlor, we did not live the happy life of two bachelors building our own pad in the skanky trailerpark that time forget, but that damn possum was huge!

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

In my next 30 years...

So last night Mrs. Ninjamunkey and I were talking about all things work related as we traveled to one of the worst dining experiences in recent memory. More on the dinner some other time. Just remind me. No really, get a sticky note, I'll wait.

Ok, got it? Now write down, bad dinner, and leave it where I can see it.

So anyway, we were talking about work, and how things have been shaping up in her career, and how mine is going stale. You see, I applied for a job the other day, and after 2 really promising phone interviews, I got the following call from the recruiter.

R:"Hey dude, (yes he is a surfer type, working in IT recruiting), I think they are really interested in you. They have not talked terms, but they have said they like what they see on your resume. But they wanted to ask if you had a bachelors degree"

Now while I was quite skilled at being a bachelor, eating ramen noodles for every meal, and making sure my paycheck lasted exactly until 2 days before payday, I never got a degree. Actually I was a college dropout after 2 semesters or so, damn internet chat rooms. You see, instead of going to class, I would just sit in the computer lab and chat in various chat rooms, since it was such new technology at the time. I would arrive an hour before my first class, and then look up and it was already 2 hours after my last class. Addiction, ain't it a bitch.

Since telling the surfer dude recruiter that I did not in fact have a degree, I have not heard from him since. I was not really that shocked.

You see, the IT field is interesting to say the least. There are kids coming out of highschool that can reprogram their X-Box to be a porn host, and rewire vibrators into VCRs. I have to struggle to stay current, when most MCSE programs are 2 box tops from Booberry and a baby tooth.

So I am thinking of going back to school. I will keep working in IT, just to fund my schooling to do what I have always wanted to do, and that is teach. I want to be an educator. I want to make a difference, oh yeah and I want to coach baseball.

So this morning I am requesting my transcript from Eastfield College. I assume that at this point, they will probably just die laughing when they see it, but hey, it might help me not have to take another English 101 class.

Monday, October 10, 2005


And so it begins, the posting of the photos in the blog to give more "texture" to my stories

Saturday, October 08, 2005

What's the Story Morning Glory?

So today I wanted to touch on a feeling that I get quite often. I wanted to get it out there in hopes of getting someone to comment with “yeah, I do that too!” or “no, you’re a freak!”

Every morning I have the same routine. I wake up at 4:30am, get dressed, grab a soda or some coffee, and head to the office. I arrive around 5:30, check out my servers, and then fire up my laptop. I first check company email, to make sure nothing blew up over night that I need to take care of. I then start with blogs. I have a list of about 10 that I read on a daily basis, but when I blog surf, I add more. I click the link, and then start reading.

One of the biggest disappointed feelings I get is when I get to a blog that has not been updated. Its kind of a “aww, no new update. Dang” I am disappointed that I can not read about other people’s lives to make mine more interesting. I feel a twinge of joy when someone has been going nuts, updating with quizzes, stories, and other things. Am I the only one out here that feels that let down when nothing new has been updated? Like there the world is spinning and you don’t know anything about it?

Perhaps I should seek blog therapy

Tuesday, October 04, 2005


---Despite the title of this entry, there were actually no references to Lynyrd Skynyrd. Shocking.---

So this weekend, we set out on a trip to visit relatives gathered to say goodbye to 2 of my cousins that were killed in a house fire. Knowing the family the way I do, I should have brought paper to write all of the things down for one heck of a blog. So now I am attempting to do this from memory. Hopefully it will paint a picture for you.

Started out, we drove through the country side to a small east Texas town. The town was one in which it sprung up out of empty fields and winding back country roads. We knew the name of the funeral home, and were not disappointed, as it was the only one in town. Google maps might as well have said “go over yonder, cross from the Fire Department, around the corner from the gas station/movie store/hardware store. Yes, all three stores were combined into the one Fina station. Superfina mart, if you will. Mrs. Ninjamunkey pointed out as we drove up “oh look they are having a fish fry at the cemetery this afternoon.”

We circled the town a few times, since I did not see anyone I recognized standing in front of the funeral home, and then placed a call to my folks, who were on the way. They soon arrived as we were gathering the baby munkey from the car and walking to the front porch. My mother quickly told us we should have been inside already, as we were family, but to be honest, I had not seen either of the 2 boys in nearly 15 years, so we were family twice removed.

We walked past the mob, and they were staring intently. I figured out what it was. We were dress nice. Shirt, slacks and a tie for me, and Mrs. Ninjamunkey was wearing a very nice black dress. Everyone there looked as if they were coming in off the lake after fishing all day, or was getting ready to go watch some stock car races, and stopped at the service on the way. No, really. I saw 3 T shirts advertising beer, 2 cartoon character shirts, and probably 20 rock band shirts, but not current bands, more like “Guns and Roses” or “Skid Row”. I think they were salivating at the thought of the rich family member coming back to make a payment or two on the trailer for them.

It was about this time there was an audible murmur from the crowd. I glance over and two plains clothes officers with obvious shoulder buldges walk toward the building. At first, I thought the county had gotten wise and picked this occasion to serve warrants. They would have made a killing. But instead, no, hey that is cousin James! He got a little furlough from prison. I heard a statement made, and I am not paraphrasing here: “Oh wow, the last time James got to come to a family function, he had to wear chains. I need to go get a hug!” Nothing says family like the state correctional van sitting in the driveway.

We go inside, and up front there was the display. Several bouquets of flowers, 2 urns, and a framed photo. Apparently they could only find a framed photo of one of the men killed. Sad really. But judging from the obituaries posted in the local newspaper, it is a good thing. Imagine the worlds worst DMV photo, as your answering a question, just having woken up and being hung over, that would be better than the photos in the obits. So one frame is it. As we walked in, there was a young woman dressed in a skin tight red mini skirt. No, tighter than you are thinking right now. She had on a faded black “guns and roses” T shirt, tied up just above her navel. Had it not been distasteful, I would have taken photos, just for you the reader to see.

As we sat down, I suddenly realized that a funeral is no place for a 2 year old. Baby Munkey was crawling all over the pews, acting like a 2 year old would, and should. We were getting dirty looks from Cletus and the clan, but really, I did not care that much. It is a celebration of life, and therefore, Baby Munkey has more life than anyone else there. And then the service started.

The minister started by reading the obituary posting, complete with dates. I think that was for those in attendance that could not read. Really. That is the only thing I could figure out. After reading the obit, the music began. I am not sure the first song, but I do know it was Skid Row. You see, Dennis, one of the men, loved Skid Row. His first son was named Sebastian for the lead singer. So here is this hair metal song blazing into the church. Everyone had the somber look as they were reflecting on the words, which I could not make out. Apparently church sound systems are not designed to handle Rock. And then the the wheels came off. The cd started skipping. A lot of skipping. It took every ounce of self control to not stand up and yell “Re-Mix!” Instead of someone actually realizing that there was a sound issue, they just let it skip. And skip. And Skip. I look at Mrs. Ninjamunkey, and she has a look on her face of pain. After a moment, I realized my face had the same look, and it was not pain, it was contorted to not scream in laughter. After 30-45 seconds of Skid-Skip, someone tried to do the artsy thing and turn down the volume slowly, as if the song was supposed to end that way, on a slow fade of skipping.

After more talking about how the two boys loved to fish and hunt, and sit on a Saturday night with a few beers (I knew the reality was a few beers in the morning, and a few in the evening) and a guitar, they played another song. Again not sure the song, but it was a country song this time, something about when I am gone, there will be a train wreck with my momma who was drunk. Not really, but it was country. It was also on a CD that apparently was used as a beer coaster first, as it was scratched all over and sounding like it was one of the original recordings from Thomas Edison.

Then talk turned to survivors of the boys. Now here is where things are kinda interesting. You see, Jimmy had just gotten engaged to a woman that was also in the fire, but managed to get out in time. (editor note: At this time they are working on bringing criminal charges against the woman for dousing the boys with some sort of flammable, and then lighting the whole thing) Now that woman was actually Jimmy’s brothers ex wife. So had the wedding happened, She would have been her children’ mother and aunt. The other boy had just reconciled with his exwife and was heading to Arkansas to be with her and his children, and this was supposed to be the going away last hurrah for him.

Of course all of this was glossed over in the ceremony, but I kept waiting for a Jerry Springer sort of moment, but none came. You know, the “you stole my husband and my dog and then killed him, the husband not the dog” type of thing. As the service was ending, they played “Every Rose Has it Thorns” by Poison. A fitting choice to end an event such as this.

I am sure at this point, if you don’t know me and are reading this, you are thinking one of several things: 1) Man this guy is a snob and an asshole. I cannot believe he would take something so sacred and make fun of it. 2) This guy would be a blast to hang out with, he is dark and demented 3) Is that you, brother Ninjamunkey?

And how was your weekend???

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Looking to the sky...

Let me start off by saying, I was a gypsy child. My parents moved me around. A lot. Until the 3rd grade, I went to a small church owned christian school in pleasant grove. For those of you not in the know, Pleasant Grove is sort of a suburb of Dallas, but still part of Dallas itself. Its a weird place man. Over the years it has gotten rougher, but until 3rd grade, it was just a place to live. That all changed one night when someone decided to break into our house. You see, we had window unit air conditioners around the house. Someone started pulling the duct tape from the sides of the A/C unit in order to either A) steal it, or B) steal me. Anyway, we decided to move to Caddo Mills, Texas. Yes that is right, Caddo Mills. We almost moved to Fate, Texas, and that sounds rather off in itself. So here we are moving for the first time in my short lifetime.

My parents were not rich by any means. In fact, they were kind of poor. I did not know it, but apparently they were. I thought all families had beans and rice for nearly every meal. I dunno, maybe mom was a horrible cook, and since dad was a vegetarian, it...aww we were poor. So when it came time to move, dad borrowed a truck from his work, and we started loading everything into white trash luggage (black hefty bags). I remember it seemed to take forever to my impatient young mind, and knowing the miles now, yeah, it would have taken forever.

It was a cold and dreary night that we were moving our stuff out to a much larger, if not much more in disrepair, home in Caddo. I remember thinking that there would be cattle running through the streets, which would be made of dirt and dust. I could see something out of Gunsmoke. I was so wrong, there was not a saloon to be found. Anywho, we were moving our stuff in this single cab Silverado truck, driving into the darkness, when something shifted in the truckbed. I remember seeing things falling from the sides of the trucks, like someone had shoved it all out. There were chairs, and boxes and plastic bins going overboard like rats on a sinking ship. So here I am, 7 years old about to get my first adult task assigned to me.

I was running along the side of the two lane blacktop "highway" looking for displaced cargo. A box here, a bag there. It started to rain, a heavy drizzle that only made the situation more pathetic. I remember carrying a bag of somthing that sounded like kitchen ware back to the truck, and handing it to dad to load. Running back down the pavement, there he was.

I had a 9 inch Han Solo figure, we had found in a garage sale. He was missing the belt, the blaster, and whatever else he was packaged with, but I still loved the hell out of that toy. He used to stomp through my room, stepping on the smaller action figures. He terrorized many a village of snoopy, GI Joe, and whoever else was around.

So there was Han, laying near the center stripe of the "highway" looking skyward. The rain was starting to fall a lot harder, and I remember seeing poor Hans eyes staring into the heavens, water pooling into the unblinking eyes. It was as if he was asking an unseen force how he managed to be in this position after so many victories, pirate runs, and shootouts, only to be fallen by a lopsided cargo hold.

I grew up a lot that day. It might have had something to do with knowing I was mature enough to sprint down the highway, chasing a house full of dreams and fallen memories. It might have been because a new stage of my life was starting, and I was going to have to figure out who I was. Or maybe it is because Han Solo showed me that its ok to look skyward, but that I need to remember to blink, or I might drown.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005


I was about 6, maybe 7. I had walked home from school, about half a mile. (see back in those days, I could walk to and from school, and not have to worry about perverts. But then again, it was a small town, and any perverts would have been run out of town by a local mob, had there been a need for it) I got home, unlocked the door, and went inside. I knew I had at least an hour but more like 2 before mom got home from work. Dad would not be home for another 4 hours or so, so I had plenty of time to get into trouble. I pushed the wicker seated dining chair across the brown linolium tiled floor. I still have no clue as to why the predominant decorating fad of the mid 80's was dark brown, dark brown with white checkerboard, dark brown with light brown, and country blue. Ick. Almost as bad as alvocado green and burnt orange of the 70's and early 80's, but when you had a transitional kitchen with the burnt orange fridge, alvocado green counter tops, except for that section of butchers block formica, and then the dark brown doors, frames and paneled walls, well obviously I came from a family of sightless, home improvement challenged procrastinators. But I digress.

So here I was, with the dark brown bentwood and wicker dining chair, pushing it up the the top level of the kitchen cabinet. This was where the goodies were kept. The candy, cookies, Little Debbie snack cakes, all of the things my parents ate after the kids were in bed. But today, I would have mine, thankyouverymuch! So I reach high on the shelf, and grabbed the first thing I found. Actually that is not true, there were probably 20 or 30 of them, and I figured they would not have a true count. I climbed back down the chair, making sure there were no finger prints.

As I ran to my room with my pirated booty, I knew the sheer joy that a jewel thief felt after a good run. I felt the adreneline rush that I am sure most race car drivers felt. It was such a sweet victory to that 6 year old. I unwrapped the little blue square, carefully, making sure not the shred the paper. I knew that if one sliver of paper were left behind, my victory would be short lived.

I took the little brown square from its former home, and carefully popped it into my mouth, and prepared myself for the chocolate explosion I was about to have. Indeed there was an explosion. At first it was salty. Then it burned my tongue, as it began to melt and fill my mouth with whatever god aweful things they had put in the piece of candy. It was gritty, like I had eaten sand. I tried to spit it out, but it was melted already, and only a brown paste came out.

I ran to the bathroom and tried in vain to wash my mouth out with the toothbrush holder full of water. That only made it worse, and seemed like I had just invited several cans of oil into my mouth. I began using the tissue to wipe my mouth out, but the tissue was cheap, and began to fall apart in my mouth. Now I had a brown burning oil soaked tissue paste in my mouth. I ran in circles trying to find a solution that would make the bad taste stop. Nothing worked. I brushed my teeth. Then I tried to drink some milk. Then I had a milky, Crest tasting brown stained mouth.

It was not until much later in life, as I prepared my first Thanksgiving dinner, that what I had actually eaten that day was a chicken boullion cube. I related this story to Mrs. Ninjamunkey last night, and I have never seen her laugh so hard. Hell, I have not laughed that hard in a long time. And as a geek in a new revoultion would say "That is totally going in my blog!"

Tuesday, September 20, 2005


So I sit here, trying to calm down after a near violence inducing fit thrown by yours truly. You see, here at the ninjamunkey home away from home (work) we have these little scanners, much like what most retailers use, in order to catalog parts for shipment. I was not involved in the team that configured them, was only the original assignee to set them up in the first place. Today, the team that did the actual programming is on thier 2nd day of vacation. And I have found a major flaw. I wont bore you all with the details, but suffice it to say, they effed it up royally. Imagine having 2 units named the same, trying to do different things. So I am trying to get things working, and get a bit fustrated. I call my "boss" and ask him what I should do. He has the approach that since we were not really trained, there is not much we can do but bandaid the situation. Here is where i get annoyed.

You see, anywhere I have ever worked, we had the "hit by a bus" program. Say person A does something, and is pretty much the subject expert. If he were to be hit by a bus, then no one would know anything about his job. So he trained another person, and then created documentation on what he did. That way, it was a covered subject. Here, not so much.

So while I know that it is not my fault that I am stuck supporting software and pieces of hardware I do not know anything about, I still feel responsible when I cannot get them to work. Makes me feel like I have no idea as to what is going on, and when I get to feeling like that, the stress, fustration, and irritation boil over. I feel like I am expendable at that point. I mean why pay someone to be here if they dont know what is going on?

So my boss just called me after I sent him an email titled "seriously screwed up" telling me that it would be ok, and to calm down and dont have a panic attack. Sure, good advice, but shouldnt he be the one to panic one in a while? Shouldn't he have a sense of urgency that I cannot find anywhere else in this company?

Monday, September 19, 2005

up, up, and away...

So Mrs. Ninjamunkey decided this past weekend would be a good time to take the baby munkey to the Balloon Festival. You see, imagine 40-50 hot air balloons taking off from a central point and flying over the city. It was a pretty cool site. However, seeing as this is Texas, the tempature hovered around the "bursting into flames" point. It was a bad sign, when the cheapo parking (5$) was already stacked up 12 hours after the event opened. There was supposed to be pony rides, face painting, and other cool kiddo activities. Not sure where the pony was, but after the mile hike into the festival area from the parking area, I was looking for that little bastard to ride back to the car. We never saw a face painting area, but we did see balloons take off. Its a good thing they were rising into the air, because the 150,000 estimated people in attendace would have blocked the view if they had not. We did get several glasses of lemonaide, and a couple of bottles of water. That was the extent of that paycheck. I think baby munkey did in fact enjoy himself, waving at the balloons and wanting to hold them. I did have a cool dad moment though. We passed a booth peddling everything from bubble makers to jewelry, where they had blow up hot air balloons. He saw them and threw a fit. The funny part was I had already made my way around the other side of the booth and was getting him one of the balloons. I came around the corner to see mom telling him to calm down, and his eyes saw me, rather saw the inflated ballon in my hand, and he lit up like a christmas tree. He was quite pleased with it, and I felt like a cool dad for picking one up for him.

All in all, it was a fairly good time, rather hot, humid, and a hell of a lot of walking, but I think he had fun, and sometimes, that is the most important part.

Friday, September 16, 2005

I remember...

I remember when I could fill up the gas tank for less than a days wages…

I remember when time clocks were punched, not swiped…

I remember when getting to third base was not, as sports guy of ESPN.com page 2 said, a threesome that was not filmed…

I remember when the conversation was “Oh I taped that last night, I will make you a copy” not “Its on my DVR, I will email you the file”…

I remember when porn was either found in discarded magazines, national geographic, or a seedy video store back room, behind beaded curtains…

I remember when 2 women having sex was taboo…

I remember when TV guide was a book of TV shows, not a website…

I remember when a website was where spiders hung out…

I remember when college students looked like adults, not kids…

I remember when girls hung out at the mall, dressed like girls, not hookers…

I remember when going to the mall was a good way to spend a Friday night…

I remember when talking on the phone required you to lean against the wall in the kitchen, trying to keep your voice down, and being tethered by a cord.

I remember when entertainment was a bottle of Boon’s Strawberry Hill and a Nintendo

I remember text messages being on a piece of paper, folded like origami…

I remember when a druggie was someone that smoked pot…

I remember when the funniest word ever being “fart”…

I remember when going out to dinner meant McDonalds…

I remember when I thought these I remember things were written by old farts.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

The fool on the hill....

Stolen from Ali, who copied and pasted several tests together to make this one, which I would like to see make the rounds....

First and middle names: Nathan Ray

Do you like your name? Do you wish you could change it?: You know, I used to hate it, because it sounds like such a redneck name, then I realized that my family is a bunch of rednecks, and knew no better

Nicknames: Nate, Ninjamunkey, Daddy Munkey

Favorite color: Gray

Super Powers: Computer fixer, that is about it. I am so lame.

Previous Jobs: Oh boy, in no particular order: marine, porn editor, photographer for insurance company, bar manager, waiter, bar tender, bodyguard, Radio Host, Car sales, grocery clerk, accounting guru, house cleaner, security guard, gas station attendant, fast food

Current Occupation: IT specialist for GM subdivision

Do you like it?: usually, but it has its moments that suck

Brothers and Sisters: One sister that makes me look like the good child

Birthdate: September 7

Zodiac sign: Virgo

Birthplace: Langdon, North Dakota (air force base)

City where you were raised: All over Texas, Oklahoma

Elementary school: Caddo Mills Elementary, Caddo Mills Texas

High School: Caddo Mills, North Mesquite, JJ Pearce, Berkner

College: some time at Eastfield Junior

Majors in College. Wasting money on classes, not attending classes

Favorite subjects in school: Math (no really) English, and creative writing

Motto: Live each day like its your last, cause one day you will be right

I wanted to grow up to be: taller. Instead I am a tubby bitch

Morning person or evening person? Right now, neither. I work varying shifts with my job, so I hate mornings and late nights

Introvert or outgoing? Introverted outgoing person

Life of the party or shy? I have no idea

Prefer to veg out or stay busy?: I love to be busy, get busy

Last time I wet the bed: Making a wet spot count?

Two liittle known skills of mine: Picking up things with my feet

Favorite hobby: Photography

Hobby you're most skilled at: I have no idea how to answer that

Favorite Game where you get to shoot people? Rush hour traffic.

Best movie you saw in the last two years? Charlie and the Choclate Factory/Batman Begins

Who is your favorite Saturday Night Live star of All-time? Farley/Hartman

Where was the worst bathroom you were ever FORCED to use? I have never been forced to use a bathroom. I am a guy, if the bathroom is grody, I go outside.

On a man, do you prefer boxers, briefs, or none? I really don’t prefer men, thanks. I do wear boxer briefs usually though

What kind of underwear, if any, do you wear?: Yeah, just covered that

What is your favorite CURRENT TV show? Rescue Me
What is your favorite SHOT? toradal

What is your favorite mixed drink? Crown and coke, or maybe a vodka tonic with lime

What is your favorite "fruity" drink?: Mai Tai

What is your favorite beer? Don’t really have one, as long as its cold and cheap

What is your dream car? Not good to dream about cars. But I would like to have a jeep wrangler soft top to run around in on the weekends

What is your favorite way to spend a weekend>: Oddly, working on the house, or shopping with my family
What is your favorite ice cream? Strawberry

What is your favorite gambling activity? Sex without birth control

What is your favorite Broadway play? Rent

Favorite Restaurant (Not a Chain)? Windy City Grill

Favorite Chain restaurant? Satlgrass

Last song you downloaded? Prince-Darling Nikki

What was your first car? A 1972 Chevy Nova

If you were an animal, what would you be? A monkey

What's your favorite animal? monkey

Do you have any pets? yes

If so, what are they? a Golden Retriever, a black Lab, and a tank full of fish

Have you ever been bitten by a dog? And if so, what kind? A pit bull, and a doberman

Have you ever had a perm? No

What color is your hair? What style is it? What cut is it? Brown, short

What color are your eyes? Brown

Favorite bottled water? Deja Blue or AquaFina

Favorite soda: Diet Coke

Favorite candy bar? Butterfinger Crisp

Favorite frozen novelty? Fudge bomb

Favorite kind of chips? Cool Ranch Doritos

Favorite Asian food: Fried Rice

Favorite "American" food: Barbecue

Favorite Italian food: Stromboli

Favorite Mexican food: Fajitas

Favorite breakfast cereal? Life

Favorite cookie: Ali’s Homemade Cookies

What was the name of your first boyfriend? Cant say as I have had one

How old were you? 30 when I took this quiz

Did you kiss him on the mouth? Hee, doubtful

Have you ever had a thing for a friend's dad? What sort of guy do you think I am?

Favorite PULP FICTION quote? Feel that sting? That’s pride fuckin with you

Shot at the doctor ASS or ARM? Arm

Do you ever want to sky dive? I have

What about bungee jumping? I have

What about Scuba diving? I have

What is your favorite Game Show? Survivor

Favorite all-time city: Chicago

At least 5:
Bands I Love:
Bowling for Soup
Blues Traveler
Maroon 5
Ben Harper and the fun loving Criminals

Books I would recommend:
Kevin Smith Speaks
The DaVinci Code
Skipping Christmas
Memory of Running

Favorite T.V. Shows:
CSI (any of them)
Rescue Me
Family Guy

Favorite movies:
Pulp Fiction
Reservoir Dogs
Kill Bill 1 and 2

Friday, September 09, 2005

Musically inspired blogging on a Friday night. Very much a direct theft of Ali's blog, and since she is hot, and a genius, I think its a great idea.

Playing: Everybody Knows-Leonard Cohen

By now, the world has become aware that as a nation, we cannot take care of our own, but will go to the ends of the earth for another country. Everyone has a reason to think this is wrong, but really, it’s a typical situation. We feed the hungry in Africa, write and sing songs about them, and forget that our streets are lined with people trying to find work. We liberate countries for democracy, pushing out regimes that are wrong, only to have our servicemen get killed trying to keep democracy in check. Is it really democratic if someone else sets it up?

Who needs Shelter-Jason Mraz

I still cannot understand what the hell went wrong in NOLA. By most accounts, it was insanity. Even more so, is that Dallas is working hard to get the displaced into apartments for free here in the metroplex. I am all for helping people that need it, but at the same time, wouldn’t that lead to the same insane effers shooting at rescue workers to live next door to me? Can I veto this yet? Dallas needs no real help in keeping the crime rates up. Seriously.

Freedom- Blues Traveler

Getting away from the deep and heavy, I have to say, aside from not being with my family, having my sleep patterns all kinds of screwed up, I kinda like working at night. I mean look, I am sitting here blogging and listening to Ipod music, and get away with it with no issues. Hell the shift manager just offered me his 2 inch TV to watch while I am here. I can work on projects, or like most nights, claim there were lots of service calls that were user error, and not have to do any work at all. I get paid for this!

Bittersweet-Big Head Todd and the Monsters

So tomorrow night, we are having my 30th birthday shindig at the casa. Most of my friends will be there, and their friends bud, jack, the captain, gin and whiskey will be making the rounds. I am hoping to have some blackjack or poker going too. I wish all of my friends could be there together, but many live in California, have lives outside of my little circle, or otherwise occupied. I will have a drink for them anyway, and one for them, and those guys over there, and him, and you.

Thanks A lot- Third Eye Blind

So question for the masses, and by masses I mean the 2 or 3 people that read this. Say you have an acquaintance, someone you don’t know super well, but she comes around. Say this person will come to your house, and decide to help themselves to food in the pantry, whatever is in the fridge. She might go into your medicine cabinet and grab some pain relievers, all the while never asking permission. Would you stop her, call her out on it, or just chalk it up to someone being comfortable in your home?

Evenflow-Pearl Jam

I walked outside tonight at dinner, and could hear a football game in the distance. You see, Friday night in Texas during the late summer and fall is football season. I could faintly hear the announcer, the quads of the marching band, the crowd yelling. It brought to mind a simpler time. Back in the late 80’s early 90’s I was a football player man for the various schools my family would move me to. Knowing that as long as there was no homework, I would be on a bus, traveling to an away game, rocking out to my discount store knockoff walkman, with the orange headphones, getting amped up for a game in which I was told to destroy the quarterback. Wondering if I played well enough, would I get a kiss from that hot cheerleader or drill team girl I had been chatting up in World History, but knowing more than likely I would wind up with the rest of the team, pretending we were getting some later. Knowing that in the hallways we were heros, and that soon, the world would know who we were. Dealing with that one teacher that did not care we were stars of the gridiron, and tried to flunk us anyway. The huge zits on my chin from the chinstrap I wore 5 days a week, hours at a time. Come to think of it, those times were not easy or simple. There was much more stress, politics, bullies, assholes and the lot. What was I thinking?

Call and Answer- Barenaked Ladies

So my sister has written us off apparently. Not that she had much to do with us in the first place. I would hear from her only when she was in trouble, or needed money, or wanted to convince me that my parents were in the Manson family and were telling horrible lies about her. She has been logged into Yahoo mobile for the past week, but will not answer when I text her. Her screen name is libertyanne2003, so feel free to try and get her to talk. Course she might offer you drugs. Never know with her. Damn, that was mean. Charlie told me to say it.

Well I am going to keep listening, you keep reading, and feel free to let me know what you think. I read all comments, and only delete the critical ones.


One of my new favorite activities to do at work when I am bored, is to go into blogger, and hit "Next Blog" button on the top right of the page. I can find every flavor of blog out there, some that I bookmark to follow up with, cause they are either amusing, funny, or just plain odd. Mind you I have to get through a lot of international blogs, which I dont read, only because I dont know that many foreign languages. Bus boy is not a language.

I am supposed to sing tomorrow night at the fiesta. Not sure how that came about, but its a good song, and one that has become one of my favorites the past few weeks. Should be a nice train wreck

So I just filled up the tank on the jeep, and it was 50 bucks. How in the hell are minimum wage workers making it to work and back? Hell, at this rate, how am I?

I watched part of the concert benifit for the Gulf Coast, and it ended abruptly. The message was the live video has ended, but in the background I could hear who i assume are IT guys walking around, talking. One hour? That is all they are going to be on? Seriously? Who decided that one?

Greatest quote I have found recently is from Steve Jobs, Apple Inc, "Live each day like its your last, cause one day, your going to be right" How true it is.

I thought I had more, but I got a rock

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Dark as a dungeon...

So I sit here tonight, really not doing much. Night shift for my company is a lot of hand holding, and answering email related questions. Not very productive. Which means a 9 hour shift feels like it is 12-15 hours long. I requested days, since that is what i have hired on for, and was told today, "we might be able to get you 2 day shifts next week" I could go on on how crappy this is, but I am going to move on.

So yesterday was my 30th birthday, and after dropping not so subtle hints, my boss had a cake waiting for me when I got here for a 2:30 meeting. The Ninjamunkey family came up here for dinner break, and we sat around in my spacious room, eating waterburger and going on a tour of the plant. While that does not seem like much, it meant the world to me.

This weekend is the big fiesta, and should be a lot of fun. I even think I am going to sing a song. I know I am going to have some drinks, and laughs. Should be a fun time.

Of course the news is still Katrina. I am tired of hearing about it, especially when they keep blaming each other for everything, and the talking heads of news media want to fan the flames. Yeah yeah, enough already. Get the people help, however you can, and move on

with that I close, I have velcro to stick, and I am trying to decide who to stick it to.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Hairbands and Ballads

So its the last day of my 20's. This is my last day to be youthful, and silly. Or so you would think. How did I spend it?

I got up early, as seeing the baby munkey is not very easy lately, as he goes to "school" while I am sleeping, and is long gone nite nite when I get home from work. So up at 7, spent a little while with the little man, and took him to school with mom. We then went to the tanning salon, because at 30, I don't want to look like the underbelly of a beached whale any longer. So we joined a tanning shop, and have gone twice.

We then went home, and started working on cleaning the garage. This has been a 2 year project in the making. Our garage is not like a normal "park your car in here, and that is it" garage. Its a "what the hell do we need this extra blender for? Oh we better keep it incase there is an emergency". So we began cleaning, and hanging shelving, and stuff like that.

We then went to buffalo wild wings for lunch, where the service, the food and the sports on TV was so bad, I found myself reading the menu over and over.

I then came to work, where I have had the distinct pleasure of doing nothing for the past 2 hours. Its nice to be paid for this, but I would gladly give up the money to be at home hanging out with the family.

So anyway, to recap, my 20s are going out with a flutter, and the 30's look to have much of the same in them for me. But sometimes, calm and boring win out over drunken debauchery. Sometimes.

Thursday, September 01, 2005


I am sitting here, listening to Stairway to Heaven on the ipod, wishing I had a normal schedule this week, as I would be home watching Tivo, or *shock*talking to my hot wife. But no, I am trying to configure a dinner bell scheduler. What that has to do with break/fix desktop support is beyond my comprehension.

I have been reading a lot about katrina the last few days. I have yet to really voice my opinion, because everyone else does it so well. Its very odd for me, and I am going to try and express it.

As I begin to dwindle down the days of my 20's, I am reminded how fleeting life is. Watching the interviews pre levee break, how people were shaking thier fists at the storm, daring ma nature to come get them, I thought it was rather funny. I thought the media coverage was a bit heavy, but hey, I am in Texas, and Lousiana is down the road. It was big news.

Then BAM the whole city is flooded, getting worse, water rising to the tops of 3rd floor buildings, blues legends, like Fats Domino, are missing, and it is a crises. Then dumb asses start shooting at helicopters, jackasses are looting for beer and jewelry, and the world is suddenly paying attention. Tsunamis have nothing on this bitch Katrina.

At one point, it dawned on me that this is not something that should happen in America, the land of the free, and home of the 30 pack of beers. This is something you hear about in 3rd world countries. This is where the guys wade through the water, and steal camels (to ride not smoke)or dates or something. Not the french quarter.

I saw pictures of gun toting marshals, and all I could do was imagine the desert behind them, not the friggin superdome. How does this happen? If water washes away Fort Worth, will there be riots over cowboy hats?

My cousin James lives just north of New Orleans, and while I was talking to him on his cell phone yesterday, he was describing the people walking through his neighborhood, just walking north. Very little car traffic, just a steady stream of dirty, wet tired faces. I wanted to cry. He was having trouble dealing with it, because as he said "I cant blame anyone for anything, but New Orleans has gone the way of Atlantis"

Who do you blame at this point? No one. Everyone. The looters, the cops, the engineers, the guy that charges 2 cents more for gas than the other station around the corner. The weathermen. No one.

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Another quiz

So false

Your Birthdate: September 7

Born on the 7th day of month gives you a tendency to be something of a perfectionist and makes you more individualistic in many ways.

Your mind is good at deep mental analysis and complicated reasoning.

You are very psychic and sensitive, and you should usually follow your hunches.

You may not take orders too well, so you may want to work alone or in a situation where you can be the boss.

This birthday gives a tendency to be somewhat self-centered and a little stubborn.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

A recent conversation...

Overheard in the Casa:

Mrs: So what do you want to do for your birthday?
Ninjamunkey: I would love to take a weekend trip, somewhere we have never been. Maybe New Orleans? I would love to site see, and get ripped on bourbon street.
Mrs: That sounds great, start shopping for the best deal...

After about 2 or 3 days, we realized that flying was the only way to do it and have time to site see, but of course, it was super expensive. So we did what we normally do with plans, and put them off. We were supposed to be there next weekend. This week, the city has been washed away, and most of it has been evacuated.

So I ask you, faithful reader (numbering 1), is that good luck that we did not go, or bad luck for the city itself. I find myself being in the former, because self preservation and safety of my family is more important that any mixed drink in the French Quarter.

Monday, August 29, 2005

Night Moves...

So this week I am working the night shift. What did I do to deserve this? Sure it is going to be slower, and in a much less hectic plant, but I am used to working 5:30am-3:30pm, and now I am getting here at 3 pm. Sucks. But I will make the best of it.

Still fighting with the insurance company over the stuff that was stolen, and it seems like it will happen for the rest of my natural life.

So the casa is just about ready for the big 3-oh shindig, and if you did not get an invite, email me. I might send one out, cause that means more presents for me. I know that is a immature way to look at it, but when your turning 30, immaturity is something you cling to.

It appears that my sister is trying to sue my parents for ruining her credit. Not that they did anything other than stop paying the bills. She is claiming that they got her the cards before she was 18 and ran them up. Only half of that is true. Who knew that she could be so evil?

Well its time to start working for a few minutes...I will try to post my activities as I go. Should provide entertainment, or at least give people reason to say "what are they paying him for?"

Thursday, August 25, 2005

The cup is half empty....

"This job would be great if it wasn't for the fucking customers"...Randal in Clerks

So its Thursday, and I have had a week to forget. Nothing spectacular other than working that shift on Monday, only to open the next morning, 4 hours later. It was great. sarcasm on high alert today.

Sitting in my office yesterday, working on a PC, surrounded by a stack of machines, printers stacked around the room, and various electronic guts laying around. Imagine my suprise when someone came to my door and said "are you in IT?"

The paper towel dispenser in the bathroom here has a instructions on it. Not so wierd. Having an arrow pointing to a small wheel and referring to it as the "emergency release" has me wondering. What the hell kind of emergency can you have with a paper towel dispenser?

Still fighting with the insurance company to replace all the stuff that was stolen, but each phone call finds them wanting more stuff. Like manuals, receipts, proof of purchases. Yeah, like I had a "when it gets stolen, here is all the paperwork I am going to need" file on my desk.

Apparently I have the super human ability to be on time to work. My co-irkers can not seem to figure that one out around here. I had a buddy I used to work with that was on average 30 minutes late each day. It was so regular, it bacame a standard. I now have my night shift counterpart that cannot arrive before 40-50 minutes after his shift begins. HE comes in at 3pm! He only works 9 hours. I am not sure why there is a problem, and I really dont know why he is still employeed. You watch, the first time I am late, I will be willing to bet that they say something to me, and I will be forced to delete thier user accounts. Shocking abuse of authority.

Baby Munkey spent the weekend with his grandparents, and came home spoiled rotten. He does not want to mind, pay attention, throws a fit when he does not get his way, and is hellbent on destruction. Oddly, that is the yearbook description of my sister. I am beginning to see a trend. Lets just hope he knows to Just Say No.

Monday, August 22, 2005

Night Shift

so today I am covering for the night guy by working his shift. Rather, I was here at 3 and working until I can sneak out the door. Of course I have to cover my normal 5:30 am shift in the morning, so I hope I can get out of here before midnight. In the mean time, I am supposed to clean the server room, and a bunch of other crap that my boss has decided I need to do. Granted he was here all day and did nothing, so its up to me. Oddly, the guy I am covering for is at jury duty. I had not idea that jury duty ran until 11-12 at night.

I should have spent the day relaxing and resting for tonight, but instead, I worked on the house, and cleaned, and hung a misting system on the new patio.

Hopefully I can get some downtime when everyone leaves, and work on important stuff, like ipod music lists, and blogs, and email and stuff. Keep your fingers crossed.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

I am a blogging, quiz taking fool!!!!

stolen from everyone else that did this before me

Name: Nathan
Birthdate: 09/07/1975
Birthplace: Langdon, ND
Current Location: Fort Worth, TX
Hair Color: Brown
Righty or Lefty: Bat and Throw Left

Your heritage: American Indian, Irish, welsh, Italian, corgi, Labrador,
Shoes you wore today: NB 405
Your fears: spiders, clowns, losing my family
Your perfect pizza: deepdish with hamburger, pepperoni, sausage
Goal you'd like to achieve: Be content to just be

LAYER THREE: there is NEVER a three.

Your most overused phrase on IM: yeah…
Your thoughts first waking up: 4:40am??? Im not in morning radio!
Your best physical feature: Adonis like muscle tone
Your bedtime: Before the news, after some Tivo
Your most missed memory: Playing outside til it got dark, not worrying about strangers, kidnappers, and pedophiles like my son will.

Pepsi or Coke: Wild Cherry Pepsi
McDonald's or Burger King: Usually Micky D’s, for consistancy
Single or group dates: single, just cause I did not have many friends
Adidas or Nike: New Balance
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
Chocolate or vanilla: swirl
Cappuccino or coffee: which is free?

Smoke: Yes, after a long hiatus
Cuss: Hell yes
Single: Proudly, no
Have a crush: all day every day
Think you've been in love: yes
Like high school: sometimes
Want to get married: Already am, so sure
Believe in yourself: nope
Get motion sickness: not much
Think you're attractive: if they like fat men in overcoats, sure
Think you're a health freak: hmmm, besides the cigarettes?
Get along with your parents: Actually, for the first time in 30 years, yes
Like thunderstorms: Love them, especially when they are violent
Play an instrument: my organ, and well guitar, and some piano

Drank alcohol: yup
Gone on a date:yup
been on stage: define stage…
eaten an entire box of Oreos: Nah, not for me
Eaten sushi: never
Been dumped: no
Gone skating: no
Gone skinny dipping: not yet
Stolen anything: the ladies hearts….

Played a game that required removal of clothing: Don’t think so
Been caught "doing something:” A few times
Been called a tease: nearly every day
Gotten beaten up: yes

Age you hope to be married: still? 80
Number of Children: only 1
Describe your dream wedding: something to look back on and smile, and have photos we could proudly display
How do you want to die: Not today, tomorrow is out too, see me in 2075
What do you want to be when you grow up: The same thing I am now, a big kid
Where would you most like to visit: Inexpensive gas station

Best eye color: Green/Hazel
Best hair color: brown/auburn/red
Short or long hair: hair depends on person, some look hot with short hair, some, not so much
Height: not a concern, but shorter than me
Best first date location: NOT El Chico’s restaurant
Best first kiss location: mouth area

Number of people I could trust with my life: two Ali and Me
Number of CDs I own: Hmmm 50 gigs of MP3’s count?
Number of piercings: left ear
Number of tattoos: planning number 2, and covering #1
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: Several
Number of scars on my body: Lets see, 100, 101, 102….not quite sure


From Ali, who stole it from Jodi, who stole it from someone else, who robbed peter to pay paul, Who did not get along with Ringo as first reported

Cheese Pizza

Traditional and comforting.
You focus on living a quality life.
You're not easily impressed with novelty.
Yet, you easily impress others.

do or do not, there is no try....

I am going to play a little bit of catch-up here, and fill you in on all the happenings of the last few days or so.

Sunday I go to get gas in the Jeep, only to find that someone had broken in, and stolen my iPod, Radar detector, laptop, digital camera, and other stuff. I did not realize how much I loved music, and the iPod until I did not have it for my 4:30 drive to work. Granted, the radar detector is still something I miss, not being able to drive 75-80mph, but at least we bought a replacement iPod, making my drive not nearly as painful.

Work has been a series of ups and downs, full of fustration, irritation, and exhaustion. In other words, another week. But its Thursday, and that is almost as good as Friday, but not as bad as Monday.
I was officially given an office, which makes things feel a little more permanant, since prior to this week, I was sitting at a folding table.

Baby Munkey is going to spend the weekend with the chainsaws, and he is excited, they are excited, and we are definately excited. See that means we get to watch TV at a normal rate, instead of taking 3 hours to watch a Tivo'd 1 hour show. There are lots of instances of "baby, dont dive from the sofa", "get out of the dog cage", "don't eat the weeks old macaroni you hid behind the curtains". Should be nice. Might actually be able to clean the house, instead of stepping over and around piles of blocks, dinosaurs, trucks, and shoes. Imagine....

Speaking of TV and all things entertainment related, here are a few to check out if you have time, or Tivo.

1) Over There-FX-I have to say, I was unsure about this one, it was brought to us by the same guy that thought Cop Rock was a good idea. Its actually a really good show, and is more about the characters and their interaction in Iraq, than Iraq and the misguided attempts being made there.

2) Family Guy-Fox-Not sure if anyone ever watched this much before it was cancelled, but I was not that impressed in the beginning. I have since gone back and watched reruns on Cartoon Network, and watch the new ones now. This show is smart, way funny, and just over the top to keep me tuning in without getting uncomfortable (see Southpark for uncomfortable jokes, yet I try to catch that too)

3) Rescue Me-FX-Not only does this have Denis Leary, one of my alltime favorite standup acts, but it constantly keeps me laughing. Then wondering if that makes me un PC for laughing. The Theme song is great, the acting is great, the characters are great, and it is something I look forward to each week.

5) New music I have recently found, for those amoung us that remember and enjoy 80's synth pop, but want something new

The Postal Service

Now everyone out there may have caught all of these items, but if not, send a check to....

Awwww, never mind, just send coffee, its still early

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Catching my breath....

So this weekend, we christened the new patio cover. We had the neighbors over for cocktails (read lots of beer) and conversation. It was quite lovely, but pointed out something we have been overlooking. We have a muddy swamp for a backyard. Granted, normally, I do not water the lawn all that much. My thought process is, if it dies, I dont have to mow it. IF mother nature is too damn busy to water my lawn for me, I am not going to pick up the slack. What has resulted from that foolhearted thought process is large bare spots that turn to mud when it does rain. The dogs then run through it and create a mess, and then track the mud all over the house, and all over the patio.
Yesterday, I started working the ground and planting grass seed. I am an impatient person by default, so waiting on grass to grow is going to be like....well, waiting for grass to grow. But the end result should be a great lush yard of green grass that I will actually take the time to water. Or I might just have bigger muddy spots with grass seed sticking out of it. At least I am trying.

Getting settled into week 2 of my 5:30-3:30 shift. Its not so bad. I can avoid the traffic in the mornings, and in the afternoons, its usually pretty light as well. Morning radio is still a pain, but luckily I have the Ipod. Trying to convince myself to go to sleep before 10:30 is a little tough, might have to work on that a little harder. Exhaustion would not be a good compromise.

Looking for ideas for my 30th birthday. I am thinking of many different things, such as a new tattoo, taking a weekend trip with Ali, having a fiesta at the house, or counting gray hairs. THe latter is something I do everyday, so why should that be a special event? Gray in my beard is something special, right?

No one has still heard from my sister, who decided it was time to cut ties with her family, and move away. She apparently is working in a car dealership, and dating a salesman who may or may not know she is still married. She may or may not still be on drugs, and may or may not still have outstanding warrants. She only calls me when she wants money, and when she does not get it, I don't hear from her again for a while, so really, not loosing much.

For those of you scoring at home, I am 12 pounds lighter. It does not make that much of a difference, but I can still honestly say that I am starting to feel more motivated to loose more. Damn the FDA for removing Effedra from the market. Sure it might give you a heart attack, make your pulse race, and give you the jitters, but damn it, I lost weight with it.

And how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? The world may never know.

Friday, August 05, 2005

Nothing to see here, move along...

I have thoughts running in my head, and no where else to put them down, so they are going here.

Why is it I have such a hard time trusting people? Why do I have an issue with meeting new people, and not thinking they are out to get me? Why is it I feel like I am spending so much time trying to earn respect for things I do, only to find I am not noticed at all? Why am I afraid every conversation, meeting, anything like that is about me? Why do I fear being fired all the time?

Why do I fear loosing the ones I love? Why am I afraid I am never doing enough? Why do I think I am not good enough? Why do I have the constant nagging sensation that something in my life is going horribly wrong, with no way to stop it?

Why are other people I work with not worried about being late? Why is it I am the one covered in sweat, running around trying to get everything done, so someone else can take credit for it? Why can’t I sleep at night for more than 3 hours before waking up in a cold sweat, afraid I have forgotten something important? Why am I afraid that the something is going to cause my world to come crashing down around me?

Why do I fear my son will grow to hate me, and everything I stand for? Why do I feel my shortened stint in the USMC makes me less of a person, patriot, man?

Why do I feel the need to continually complain about every job I have ever had? Why do I do this to my wife, when our time together is limited as it is?

Why do I fear every warning light, knock, ping or shudder is a sure sign I bought a car that is going to fall apart?

Why do I think people are going to read this, and those that know me are going to pat me on the head and move around me like the crazy man in the middle of the street wearing a football helmet?

Why can’t I be anything but fat and lazy?

Why do I have fears that others would see as irrational?

Why did I even bother posting this?

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Almost quick hit style...

So I have to ask. What is a fumar? There are signs all over the plant that say no smoking and no fumar. I guess if I ever spot an elusive fumar, I am going to have to shoot it on sight.

Time to vent. One thing that really irritates me: When someone with no children like to chime in with ways you are not raising yours correctly. We were told by the Munkey-In-Laws that we are blase about baby munkey's safety. Yeah when he falls and hurts himself, we usually yell "suck it up" and move on. I don't care how many degrees you have, how much you make, what you drive or where you live. My child is my child. Just because I don't dress him up in full pads everyday, a helmet for his little head, and surround him with pillows, that does not make me a bad dad. Providing that much protection will not make him a better person, it will make him sheltered. We do tend to take a "if he hurts himself, he will know not to do that next time" but not for something like juggling chainsaws. I never wore a helmet when I rode a bicycle, and I am still here to tell the tales of jumping off of homemade ramps, 8 feet in the air.

scariest thing I have heard all day:
Spoken by a coworker, who is about 5'8" and 300 pounds. "Man I really love the food from the Roach Coach. Its not horrible at all!"

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

You see...

There are some things in life you should never have to do. Waking up at 4:30am to be at work at 5:30am should not happen, unless you work in morning radio. But that is what I have been instructed to do. I am supposed to be here 30 minutes before everyone else, in order to verify all of the servers are running and whatnot. My boss used to have that distinction, but could not get here on time, so I was dedicated to the task. Yet he is still my boss. Not sure how that works out. Oh well, traffic is light, it only takes 40 minutes instead of an hour, and I get to see the sun come up every morning. Hooray. Note the sarcasm.

So back to my teases from a week ago...

My son is developing a foot fetish, or potential for a foot fetish. He loves to put shoes on, especially his momma's shoes. My socks, her sandles. He tries to rip the shoes from the other children at daycare. Especially the girls. he is not paying for used stocking on the internet, and he is not wanting pictures of feet, but does have a fascination with feet.

In other news, we had a patio cover built this past weekend. After I get the misting system set up, we will have a little oasis in the back yard of the casa. Of course, its only like 111000 degrees out most afternoons, so shade is not that valuable. Again with the sarcasm.

Movie that you should go see if you have a sick sense of humor: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I loved the original, and its sense of wonder and acid trippyness, but the new one is just as good, only different. Johnny Depp plays the eccentric quite well, and Tim Burton is true to form. The music is done by Danny Elfman, who I think is greatness. Just go out and purchase/download (leagally mind you) any old oingo boingo or music from NIghtmare Before Christmas. It is a very good movie and I would tell everyone of my friends to go see it

I would like to close with a thought that has bothered me for the past week. I am now only scheduled for 50 hours a week, as opposed to 75-90. It almost feels like a vacation. Time for more coffee. Have a great day.

And remember "Don't touch that squirrel's nuts, he does not like it"-Willy Wonka